People in their 20s and 30s are facing quarter-life crisis, something completely unheard of their parent’s time. So we decided to dig a little deeper in an effort to help our peers feel a little better. Nothing in life remains the same, the same goes for our lives. We are all busy looking for things as per our priorities. One thing which has caught-up our attention in these decades are- Why are so many young people facing quarter-life crises?
What many parents and people from the previous generations can’t understand or may seem too obvious as the cause of the problem is something that befuddles all of us in our 20s. Why are we sad or not content with out lives? Why does anxiety grip us when there nothing terribly wrong with our lives? What is going on? Its a heady cocktail of expectations that we have from our lives with respect to careers, relationships, friendships, life goals….etc etc.
Let us look into the depth to understand the real reasons behind these depression and anxieties:
1. “Most connected electronically and disconnected emotionally”
Since the present time is ruled by internet, young people are more inclined towards various social media websites to stay in touch with their peers. Also it serves the purpose staying updated with the current so called ‘Cool’ things or to stalk the person you like or dislike, youngsters spend their quality time on these sites. And since their life is more in virtual world, they could not take up the challenges life throws upon them. In the words of Clinical social worker Ms Carberry “They are the most connected electronically and disconnected emotionally.”
Spending too much time online is making us feel disconnected and even more lonely. That time could have been spent on a hobby that would recharge our mind and soul.
2. You feel inadequate when compared to other peers
This is also one of the consequences of social media connections. Before the era of social media, people were not so much connected with one another and did not have much of idea what their batch-mates, school friends or people from their city or town were upto. But thanks to facebook, we know what everyone is upto, we even know what they eat and where they eat! Information overload is never a good thing. What we tend to forget is that other people are only posting about the highlights of their life and now the low-points. We only see the good parts and compare our lives with other people’s and hence end up feeling miserable.
3. Intense fear of Failure
Fear to get fail in some exam, or when you are trying new things and opportunities? Fear to get fail in Life? This intense fear is everywhere. Even sometimes in small things. It is usually seems that youngsters get more panicked with the fear of getting lost. It should be there too.You want to try hard to achieve but what if you get fail? Listen..Your life is not gonna fucked up irritating after this.! There are lots of chances. Go and get it.
4. You feel like your life is not turning the way you have expected it would be
This might be the biggest stress of your life. Expectations v/s reality. Hahh! You constantly think this was not how you expected your 20s to be or 30s to be. Nothing great was achieved fast or easily. People struggle for 10-15 years before achieving their dreams. So chill and re-evaluate your expectations and keep them real and in the words of the wisest fish in the world “Just Keep Swimming”
5. You feel nostalgic about your school or college days
School days..when life was simple. College days were full of fun. You have lots of memorable things. Cherish those. But do not let yourself incapsulate in those memories. You have grown a little by now. Even this time too is not gonna come back. Enjoy this moment to make it memorable or as they say, stop and smell the roses.
6. Disappointment with your jobs
You always think, Damn! This was not I actually wanted. You think your life have become boring. You constantly seem to be nostalgic about your happy college days. Don’t worry. You have grown up with the work. This is teaching you a lot. Perhaps preparing to be a better person to face-up the challenges, to understand this world better.
7. You see your Dating life disparately
You don’t want that creepy love relationship which leads to nowhere. You want a long term one and you keep asking yourself constantly whenever you meet your kinda person, “Whether this is the right person?” and when you left unfulfilled you are like,”Whether it is too late to find someone?”
Steps to be taken to avoid it:
Life is not a rat race:
Always keep in mind- you have the right to be happy. Being happy and content is a decision you can make right now, its not something you will get after you tick off things from a list. That list will only get replaced with another list. Don’t think that quitting a career you hate or breaking-up a worthless relationship is setting you back. Life is too short to waste on something that does not even make you happy. Decide what is worthy!
Find yourself and get comfortable:
Confront yourself. Your school and college marks, your job are not gonna define yourself for your whole life. At the end you will have to face yourself. So find your identity, just for yourself.
Loosen your expectations:
Your friends are getting married or doing a high-profile job and you think you are in the mid of the crisis. Stop feeling that shit! You do not need to feel alone. Look around you. You have so many good people. Surround yourself with them, who makes you feel happy and safe. It is the right time to loosen your expectations.
Be grateful for what you have: We might have what other people pray for each day. We tend to take the wonderful things in our life for granted. Compare your life with those of less-fortunate and think how kind life has been to you in comparison. Even if you have just one friend, be glad that you at least have one! Some people might not even have one friend. There are people born with life-threatening diseases, be glad you have a healthy body. Once you realise that you have so much to be grateful about, you will start feeling better.